Pacquiao: Exposed

by Madcow

Enough with the silliness, ok?

Everyone knows that most Manny Pacquiao fans wouldn't know a heavy bag from a douche bag, so I cut them some slack for a few weeks, but as the Pinoy Illusionist starts to wind up the hype machine for another bogus fight with yet another shell-shocked and boiled-down name fighter, I have no choice but to step in and bring some much-needed reality back to the boxing world.

Pacquiao, beyond a shadow of a bovine doubt, is sporting the most overblown, overrated ring record and list of accomplishments in, probably, the history of the sport. Sure, he beat a near-prime Barrera and Morales, but for crissake, how long can he coast along based on just two fights?

Instead of wasting my wonderful Madcow prose on a topic that makes me feel dirty inside, I'll just list the cold, hard facts behind the farce that is Manny Pacquiao:

• A lot has been made about Pacquiao winning 6 titles in 6 weight classes, but the downside never gets mentioned: In his entire career, he's only made 4 successful title defenses, with the last being way back in 2003!


• 5 Of Pacquiao's last 11 opponents came into their fight directly following a loss.


• Of his "history making" wins versus Barrera, Morales and Marquez, only the first Barrera win is without taint. His second win against Barrera was a farce, Morales was horribly shot by the time of their third fight and, actually, had been beaten solidly by Zahir Raheem before Pacquiao-Morales 2. And most everyone acknowledges that Marquez won the second Pac-JMM fight while some say JMM won both.


• Yes, Pacquiao started out at 106 lbs., but he was 16 years old! De la Hoya, at 16, weighed 106 lbs. too.


• After the toughest tactical fight of his career, Pacquiao went soft by picking on the weakest Lightweight champ around, David Diaz while still having unfinished business with Marquez.


• Ivan Calderon could've knocked out the Nicole Ritchie-esque Oscar De la Hoya that night they fought.


• Ricky Hatton is a bum and not even among the Top 5 best Jr. Welters.


• If you hate Mayweather, then you must hate Pacquiao even worse for absolutely perfecting the cherry-pick as Pacman insists on fighting only those who will give in to all of his wacky demands.

So, all in all, I'm glad to be the one to teach you the folly of your ways. Please address all thank you letters to Paul Magno's e-mail: boxing_times@yahoo.com. Make sure to write- Attn: Madcow so he can forward all your letters of apology and donated cash to me.

Now, go and find another hero who actually wants to make real fights.

P.S. Pacquiao's music sucks too!

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